You don’t have to ask permission to make a new friend.
When you have a BFF, hanging out with someone else is a hostile act. But if I want to have coffee with the new girl in my Kickboxing class, I can do so without having to worry about whose butt it will hurt.
You’ll never have to make a speech at their wedding.
Or be pissed when they pick someone else to be their best man/lady. Or talk them through their cold feet. Or cash in your life savings when they decide to have a destination wedding (Bali?! Really?!).
You’re free to ‘do you’ whenever and however you want.
When you don’t have the option to hang with someone 24/7, you take more “me” time, crossing things off your life’s to-do list rather than always getting caught up in someone else’s interests…or drama.
Everything doesn’t have to be “our” thing.
It’s great to have someone who gets as excited about S’mores Frappucinos as you do, but sometimes maybe you’d like to break out of the rut, order a vanilla latte, and NOT try to hit on the hot barista.
You retain the ability to make small talk.
I know some people who can’t deal in social situations unless their BFF is present. And as soon as they’re reunited, they dissolve into this weird combination of inside jokes and finishing each other’s sentences. HUGE EYE ROLL.
Your secrets are actually safe.
Best friends tell each other EVERYTHING. Even more than married people. And loose lips sink ships. When you’re BFF-less, other friends and family trust you to keep their confidences locked up where they belong.
When life makes you a sh*t sandwich, you know how to deal.
What do you do when you can’t call your BFF for ice cream and Friday Night Lights therapy? You find a way to cope like an adult. (You may also have dragon babies.)
You can be opinionated and not feel bad about it.
Strong opinions often breed conflict, and fighting with your BFF over music or politics or whether adult women should wear rompers (they should NOT) is the worst. When you’re BFF-less, however, you’re free to spout off to whomever will listen, and damn the consequences.
You can also change those opinions. Often, if you want.
Even better than changing your opinions, you can also change yourself–your looks, the books you read, the places you hang out–and no one will throw you side shade or say things like “I don’t even KNOW you anymore…”
You’ll never get caught up in their bad choices.
Best friends are hard to say no to. Even when you really REALLY should. Not having one means you’ll never be an innocent casualty of their life tornado.
You become fiercely independent.
Without a BFF to validate (or question) your decisions, you learn to do exactly what makes YOU happy. You try new things, new people, new foods. And if those things turn out to be mistakes, you might actually learn from those too (instead of just being told it’s someone else’s fault).